At the end of the Divergent series, the author Veronica Roth shared tips on improving writing. One of them was to "word vomit." This means to throw everything I Think into a post without editing. So, who knows what will come out of this?
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She stared up at him with teasing eyes. The height difference between them was almost endearing, yet she didn't seem to mind that she would have to be on her toes to reach him. He looked down at her with frustrated eyes. His long blonde lashes blinked as he tried to see her motive for all of this.
He studied her: she was a plain looking girl with a twist of exotic look to her. She had long dark hair that fell a little past her waist, grey-blue eyes with long lashes, and a youthful rounder face. She was pale and thin, but still had a good curve to her small body. One thing he liked about her was the dresses that she always wore that would stop mid-thigh because that type of dress could show off her thin legs.
She was confusing to him. When he tried to become close with her, she would retreat, stop answering her phone, ignore him in person, and stop eating lunch with him.
Yet when he would give up and pull back, there she would be,taunting him. Asking to sit with him, teasing him with small glimpses of her thigh and sometimes standing on the edge of the staircase when she knew he would have a good view underneathe her dress. He found it exhillerating, yet tiring. He couldn't understand what she wanted of him.
She knew the main point of what she wanted. She wanted to have his attention. Not so much that he seemed desperate, yet enough to keep him looking only at her. If he drew too close, she backed away. If he gave up, she gave him hope again. She knew she wasn't the prettiest of girls, but she knew for sure that her looks were the first thingthat had caught his attention.
Ever since the first day of school, when he walked by her row of desks, she saw a hint of interest in his glances. She thought he was a bit cute, his hair short and so blonde it was translucent, much taller that her, and of a medium build. He wasn't fat, but he looked like he was at one time skinnier. And that was ok with her, as she never intended their relationship to go too far.
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Heart pounding, she voluntarly lifted her dress over her head. It was a pastel pink babydoll dress that made her look even younger than what she actually was but she had worn it that day because it was mid-thigh, and she knew he would like it. Especially since she wore high heels with it.
She couldn't believe she had let it get so far. He held her in his big lap, her facing him. He had no shirt on, and now she only was wearing her underwear and bra, which bulged with her chest. Both breathed heavily, completely in silence. He gently tugged strands of dark brown hair from her front, revealing her chest area. He pushed her back onto the floor slowly. She looked absolutely terrified, and he felt a strange mix of empathy and victory welling up inside. He grinned at her as he noticed her fragile body shivering on the floor.
It was almost like revenge for all of the teasing over the last couple of months. He had only held interest for her, half because she was annoyingly intriguing, and partly because he had hope. This was that hope coming to life now.
He leaned over her to kiss her. They had once before this time, but she had ignored him for an entire week afterwards. Trembling, she complied, kissing him back slowly. She wondered silently how she had let it go this far... and what would he think of her after he would have experienced all of her?
As she was about to roll to the side, he leaned his forearm on the hem of her long hair, making it impossible for her to turn her head away. She realized that what he thought of her was the least of her problems. Someone could easily find them here. After hours, the classrooms were never locked. She softly pleaded him to stop, but she knew it was too late to go back. Too late to go back to the way they were. Eventually this would happen again, in a different location.
He immersed himself in kissing her bare body. Slowly she could feel the straps of her bra coming loose, and she could feel her cheeks becoming hot, so much that all she could do was tilt her head up so she wouldn't see what was happening. He carefully slipped the straps off, undoing each from the back so she would not be able to keep the on at her elbows. Her skin was snow white, untouched by the sun. It was always something she prided in, and he thought she was beautiful.
He found it amusing how different, how vulnerable she was acting from her normally teasing self. Her eyes begged him to stop as he uncovered her chest, but he just looked down at her with teasing eyes.
As he kissed her again, she could feel him pulling her body into his arms. She felt so small, protected, yet terrified. Holding her from behind, his large hands slipped from her chest down her stomach to the underwear that remained. She closed her eyes and helped him slide it off her hips and down her slender legs.
Kissing her neck near her ear, she giggled, and he took the opportunity to rest her back on the ground, sprawled out and completely exposed. Expecting her to look up at him afraid, he is surprised. She smiles up at him with a twisted teasing smile, yet her wrists are shaking in his grip. He laughed and took off his remaining clothes.
She looks into his eyes, hair spread like a dark fan on the floor, and pulls his neck down to kiss him again.
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I'm going to leave it at that! ;) now I will go through and edit to the new version below:
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She stared up at him with teasing eyes. The height difference between them was almost laughable, yet she didn't seem to mind that she would have to be on her toes to reach him. He looked down at her with frustrated eyes. His long blonde lashes blinked as he tried to find her motive for all of this.
He studied her: she was an overall plain looking girl with a twist of an exotic look to her. She had long dark hair that fell a little past her waist, round grey-blue eyes with long lashes, and a youthful round face. She was pale and thin, but still had a good curve to her small body. One thing he always liked about her was the dresses that she wore that would stop mid-thigh because that type of dress could show off her thin legs.
Her attitude towards him was perplexing to him. When he tried to become close with her, she would retreat, stop answering her phone, ignore him in person, and stop eating lunch with him.
Yet when he would give up and pull back, there she would be, taunting him. Asking to sit with him, teasing him with small glimpses of her bare skin and sometimes standing on the edge of the staircase when she knew he would have a good view underneathe her dress. He found it exhilarating, yet at the same time draining. He just couldn't understand what she wanted of him.
But she knew the main point of what she wanted. She wanted to have his attention. Not so much that he seemed desperate, yet enough to keep him looking only at her. If he drew too close, she backed away. If he gave up, she gave him hope again. She knew she wasn't the prettiest of girls, but she knew for sure that her looks had been the first thing that had caught his attention.
Ever since the first day of school, when he walked by her row of desks, she saw him stealing glances at her. She thought he was a bit cute, his hair short and so blonde it was translucent, much taller that her, and of a medium build. He wasn't chubby, but he looked like he was at one time skinnier. And that was ok with her, as she never intended their relationship to go too far.
*********************************************************************************
Heart pounding, she voluntarily lifted her dress over her head. It was a pastel pink babydoll dress that made her look even younger than what she actually was but she had worn it that day because it was mid-thigh, and she knew he would like it. Especially since she wore high heels with it.
She couldn't believe she had let it get so far. Her white heels were scattered on the ground next to her dress. He held her in his big lap, her facing him. He had no shirt on, and now she only was wearing her underwear and bra, which bulged with her chest. Both breathed heavily, completely in silence. He gently pushed back the strands of dark brown hair away from her face, exposing her chest area. He layed her back onto the floor slowly. She looked absolutely terrified, and he felt a strange mix of sympathy and victory welling up inside. He smiled at her as he noticed her fragile body shivering on the floor.
It was almost like revenge for all of the teasing over the last couple of months. He had only held interest for her, partly because she was annoyingly intriguing, and partly because she was always giving him hope. This was that hope coming to life now.
He leaned over her to kiss her. They had kissed once before this time, but she had ignored him for an entire week afterwards. Trembling, she complied, kissing him back slowly. She wondered silently how she had let it go this far... and what would he think of her after he would have experienced all of her?
As she was about to roll to the side, he leaned his forearm on the hem of her long hair, making it impossible for her to turn her head away. She realized that what he thought of her was the least of her problems. Someone could easily find them here. After hours, the classrooms were never locked. She softly pleaded him to stop, but she knew it was too late to go back. Too late to go back to the way they were. Eventually this would happen again, in a different location.
He immersed himself in kissing her bare skin. She noticed the straps of her bra slowly coming loose, and she could feel her cheeks becoming hot, so much that all she could do was tilt her head up so she wouldn't see what was happening. He carefully slipped the straps off, undoing both from the back so she would not be able to keep them on at her elbows. Her skin was snow white, untouched by the sun. It was always something she prided in, and he thought she was beautiful.
He found it amusing how different, how vulnerable she was acting from her normally teasing self. Her eyes begged him to stop as he uncovered her chest, but he just looked down at her with a teasing smile.
As he kissed her again, she could feel him pulling her body into his arms. She felt so small, protected, yet terrified. Holding her from behind, his large hands slipped from her chest down her stomach to the underwear that remained. She shivered and closed her eyes, helping him slide it off her hips and down her slender legs.
Kissing down her neck near her ear, he took the opportunity to rest her back on the ground. She was completely exposed. Expecting her to look up at him afraid, he was surprised. She smiled up at him with that familiar twisted teasing smile, yet her wrists were shaking in his grip. He laughed and took off his remaining clothes.
She looked into his eyes, hair spread out like a dark fan on the floor, and pulls his neck down to kiss him again.
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Okay, I wonder where I would have gone with that? It feels scary posting my draft here with the edited version.
